We Know Marriages Need Love, But What About Respect?
One key word can revolutionize any marriage according to Dr. Emerson Eggerichs, author of the new book Love & Respect. Eggerichs says happiness and harmony are not achieved by love alone. Yes, love is vital, especially for the wife, but the author says, a husband’s need for respect is equally important-he is designed to need respect.
For the past 25 years, we have heard much about love, but the divorce rate among evangelicals has continued to rise. Eggerichs says, “The major problem, which I heard from wives, was ‘He doesn’t love me.’ Wives are made to love, want to love, expect love. Many husbands fail to deliver. But as I kept studying Scripture and counseling couples, I finally saw the other half of the equation. Husbands weren’t saying it much, but what they were thinking was, ‘She doesn’t respect me.’ Husbands are made to be respected, want respect, expect respect. Many wives fail to deliver.” As a result, two good-willed people end up on what Eggerichs calls the Crazy Cycle: without love she reacts without respect, without respect he reacts without love—it is a painful, negative cycle that has thousands of couples spinning out of control.
Love & Respect is divided into three main sections
- The Crazy Cycle explains the simple reason why two good-willed people negatively react to each other;
- The Energizing Cycle explains how two people can positively motivate one another by doing one simple thing; and,
- The Rewarded Cycle unveils the rewards of a godly marriage and explains what a person can do if personal expectations are unmet by a spouse.
To learn more about the Love and Respect books, resources, and conferences visit www.loveandrespect.com. If you are interested in talking with someone about your marriage or are need of specific help in dealing with relationship issues please contact our Counseling Center at 317-776-4187.